“A traumatic experience, can be described as an experience that causes an emotional wound, leading to a psychological injury; which of course, relates to ones mind and behavior”.
I can say for a fact, that each and every one of us has gone through a traumatic experience before. These traumatic experiences may include;
- Losing a loved one.
- Getting raped/almost getting raped.
- Failing/making a mistake about something.
- Getting involved in an accident.
- Being sexually molested.
- Getting Kidnapped etc.
And many other things that causes us trauma. So today, I decided to talk on four basic steps to take in order to gradually come out, of a traumatic experience. There are many steps one has to take but i decided to talk about this four steps, because I’ve seen them being used before and believe me when I say that they really helped.
- Find someone to talk to:
I decided to put this as number 1 because, even if we don’t know this, talking to someone actually helps. Now, when I say talk to someone, it doesn’t necessarily mean you should go talk to a professional therapist or become involved in group discussions. You can talk to any trusted person, it can be one of your family members, your pastor/spiritual leader or even a close friend of yours. And I think that the most important person someone can talk to is God. He created us, therefore he is the main person that can guide you to the part of recovery.
Paying visits to a therapist and engaging in group discussions also goes a long way to help. Talking about your experience and feelings to someone, doesn’t label you as weak. It just means that you are a human being and trust me when I say that everybody in this world, will always be in need of someone to talk to. From what I’ve seen, I believe talking to someone (God Included) helps to free ones emotions. You see, keeping bottled up emotions isn’t healthy, for your mind and your health. Pouring them out to someone really helps you.
2. Accept what happened (Acceptance):
Let me tell you something, talking about your experience to someone doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve taken a big step to recovery. If you cannot bring yourself to acknowledge what happened to you, you can never move on. Some people try to erase the thoughts of the experience from their minds, instead of trying to accept it. The truth here, is that you can never erase the memory, no matter how hard you try.
It has happened and nothing can change that. Trying to force your mind to do the impossible in erasing the memory, will just cause you more nightmares and psychological damage. Accept what happened, learn from it, grow from it and move forward. The real change, starts from you accepting what happened to you and embracing the new you.
3. Register the thought that you are not the only one:
Just like I said in the beginning, everyone has gone through a traumatic experience before. I believe that what helps some people, is the case whereby they remind themselves that they are not the only ones that have gone through such an experience before. So, they tell themselves that if others can go through such experiences too, and still come out strong, then they can do it as well.
You are not the only one in the world that has gone through a traumatic experience before, trust me everyone has. You are not the only one, therefore don’t feel alone. Survivors are out there, who inspire people every single day with their stories. Decide to be just like them and choose to make a difference.
4. Decide not to be defined/labelled by your experience.
It takes a lot of strength, to do this particular step, trust me. In every sense of the word, this is absolutely true. No one should ever be defined/labelled by his/her traumatic experience. Just because it happened to you doesn’t mean you have to let it define who you are. Just because you where raped, doesn’t mean you’ll have to carry the label of “the raped girl/boy” all your life. Just because you’ve failed many times doesn’t mean you’ll have to carry the label of “a failure” all your life. You are more than that. You are a survivor and you are an inspiration to many people.
Defining yourself by your experience, only affects you mentally and can also affect your self esteem. So regardless of what people or the society want to label you as, choose for yourself not to be defined by that. Don’t give up and choose to remain strong.
I’ll be stopping here today. Just like I said in the beginning, there are other steps, but I decided to talk about this four, because I’ve seen them being used before. In conclusion, I feel that if you are willing to recovery from your experience and you believe you can, then you will. It’s all about you and how you program your mind.
Feel free to talk about any other step or any step you’ve tried before in the comment section. I’ll be looking forward to hearing your opinions. Stay safe👍.